Sunday, 5 a.m.
Mark, what's up, buddy? Just calling and giving you an update. I'm very sunburned about the nose and face area. We played at Ko'olau,which literally looks like Jurassic Park. With the trees and the mountains, you feel like you're in a different world. It's the most unbelievable golf course, one of the hardest in the world, and I shot probably 160 on it. But we had a lot of fun. One bad thing, we had to walk some of the holes, which wasn't good. You're literally on top of a mountain at one point, shooting down over a bridge into an undulating green. Plus, it rained a little, and our golf carts were sliding all over the place. It was seriously scary at some points, because you're going around these ledges.

I meant to ask: Did you take your wife with you this trip?
Yeah. She's Filipino, and she lived in Hawaii for a few years. So she knows about it and takes me around. She loves golf, too, but she usually watches me in the tournament and then I'll take her golfing. It's nice to come back afterward and have a massage lined up. I get the shiatsu, the deep massage that kills your muscles. It knocks you out.

Sunday, 4 p.m.
Hey, Mark, it's Kevin James, just checking in. Last night we had dinner at Alan Wong's, which is an unbelievable restaurant. We've gone there a couple of times. They've got the greatest food. I'm just having a blast out here in Hawaii and eating like crazy. I'll tell you the thing I love at breakfast here: the Portuguese sausage. There's another thing, these wraps with rice and meat. And Spam is unbelievable. I love Spam and eggs. Everybody knocks it, but it's really good. The buffet is through the roof at my hotel. I load up right before I go out and golf, and if I eat too much Portuguese sausage, I feel bad for the rest of the foursome. You know, the physical fitness is kind of taking a back seat. But everything's going well and I'm looking forward to touching base with you more.

Hang on a second, Kevin. I was wondering if you've left Oahu at all and ventured out to the other islands.
Another trip, I flew to Maui to do a corporate stand-up gig. We rented motorcycles and drove the island. We stopped in a beautiful little town, Hana, and went to a little store called the Hasegawa General Store.

Monday, 5 a.m.
Hey, Mark, it's Kevin. Last night we went to the Ward Theatre to see a screening of Hitch, which played great. It was a great theater. If you want to see a movie, I would go to the Ward, and I would see Hitch if I were you. That's just my advice, that's just me. Then we came back to the hotel and drank until it was time to change our shirts. I was pretty much out. Now I'm just hanging out in the lounge. Tonight, I think we're going back to Caffé Latte, where Mamma is going to cook for us and I'm going to set an eating record. I'll let you know how that goes a little later.

Tuesday, 5:30 a.m.
Hi, Mark. I have some more cool places to tell you about. We ate again here in the Kahala Mandarin Oriental at a place called Tokyo Tokyo, where, although I'm not a big sushi guy, I thought the food was just incredible. We ate at the buffet at Hoku's again, too, until I almost exploded. I also wanted to mention one of the other cool things here: shaved ice. That's something I can't find in the States. But when I do, I'm going to take a bath in it, because it's absolutely incredible.

Sunday, 5:18 p.m.
I wanted to tell you that last night the very generous Will Smith threw a luau for us. That was pretty cool. There were some hula dancers and I don't know what the other dancers were, but they were pretty big. I was actually considering putting on a pair of coconuts and getting up there myself. We had great food and all had a lot of fun. So I just thought I'd tell you that it was really cool. Okay, man, take care. he said …