Technology, smechnology. Yeah, you could buy one of Swingline’s fancy new InVision ($9) or Optima ($16-$17) staplers — with built-in storage compartments and staple removers, indicators to let you know when you’re running low on staples, and even a jam-free guarantee. But we still like their heavy-duty Rio Red model ($31), the one inspired by Office Space — that movie with the weirdo Milton who got a bit too attached to his Swingline. Is it old-­fashioned? You betcha. But the die-cast metal construction will outlast even the cockroaches. www.swingline.com